Blog: Proper Poorly

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You find me today BRAVELY carrying on having STAGGERED (bravely) into work and SLUMPED myself over my desk, giving off the occasional cough, sniff and/or splutter. For LO! I am Proper Poorly!

My MALAISE commenced on Tuesday, at which point The Lemsip In My Satchet advised me to not go in to work. I concurred and thus had a very pleasant day feeling mildly unwell but getting loads of ADMIN, also Christmas Wrapping, done. I also watched "X-Men: Apocalypse", which is RUBBISH.

This was precisely the level of poorliness that I like - enough to be respectable for having a sickie day, but not enough to stop you watching telly. However it then got WORSE the next day, and REMAINED at that level the next, when I had - FOOLISHLY - told people I'd be back at work. It was ROTTEN and I got home BEDRAGGLED, eventually going back to bed at 9:30pm rather than my usual 2:30pmn After Going Clubbing Nightly Like What I Do. I thus got about TEN HOURS kip, which was jolly nice except that it was full of FEVER DREAMS. I don't usually MIND these - Moon Horse started out as a FEVER DREAM ("this explains A LOT", says one and all) and one time I dreamt an ENTIRE EXTRA SEASON of Star Trek: Deep Space Nine. It was AMAZING!

THIS time however it was a lot about Sophie Countess Of Wessex negotiating with aliens about SQL to power their plumbing systems which involved small Fiat cars and EVERYTHING ELSE EVER. It was extremely dissatisfying, and when I woke up I STILL felt poorly!

Regular readers will know that I had a flu jab last month, so I was kind of expecting to be INVULNERABLE for the next six months. However, friends of a Scientific Bent inform me that that's just for INFLUENZE and cold viruses still have free rein. Curses! Thanks, "science", next winter I'm getting a DREAM CATCHER!

Anyway, the upshot of all this is that I've had to cancel my appearance at Scaledown tonight. I am EXTREMELY disappointed as these are ALWAYS good fun AND it's only FOUR minutes from my desk at work, but I fear if I turn up I will make a noise like Bob Dylan being put through a woodmill at high speed and INFECT all and sundry. It still looks like a dead good (possibly better now!) night, if you're in That London tonight I would HIGHLY recommend it!

I, however, will be sat at home with a Lemsip, hopefully watching some telly. BRAVELY!

posted 16/12/2016 by MJ Hibbett

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